I need some time away

It has come to my attention that I need time away from everyone and everything. I need the beach and its sand between my manicured toes. The color on my toes this month is a dark red, so dark red that it is almost the color of dried blood, making it nearly black. You can read into it any way you'd like.
Where I want to go used to be to visit a friend of mine in CA. But now that has slipped out of my grasp and I'm no longer holding the boat that would have taken me away to where I needed to be: away from here and with him. Oh how I wish I was with him.
But I let go of the ropes and the boat is floating passengerless out into the open ocean on a dark warm night, silent as it crosses the moon's beaming path. The water laps against its sides as the world yearns the lack of me on board the boat to my version of heaven i.e. visiting my friend.
So next up is a beach trip. I will be by myself, I will read on the beach and get a healthy tan by myself. I will get food by myself and go to bed by myself and it will be totally about me and for me. I will relax. I will miss people like so much that I'm sure I'll find some nice ones to talk to. I'm leaning toward somewhere easy like Bethany Beach. My parents are comfortable with Bethany since we've been there so many times and the prices aren't too bad at this one place we're familiar with. I'll give you an update if I get away on this little vacation after all, but for tonight that's where my head is it. Hopefully I'll even dream about it.